SJFCC vs Archway Graces

SJFCC vs Archway Graces
2004-09-05. Loss By Dave

Evening all,


Belated match report for last Sunday’s (5th) game. It’s going to be brief as there isn’t really much to shout about!

Result: Mighty (ish) Fishers, 82 all out from 30.3 overs; Archway Graces, 83 for 7 from 30 overs.

We batted first and were absolutely shocking. I blame Chris for winning the toss for the first time in his life. Andy H and Ant opened – Andy got a single then square-cutted to backward square leg who took a bloody good diving catch. Andy Turpin then came in on his debut with big things expected of him after his maximum twatage in the nets over the past couple of years.

Maybe it was the wind and daylight that did him as he’s unused to playing outside, but he edged one to the keeper for a duck.


Sandeep then came in and began well, hitting a 2 and a nice 4, before being surprised by a full toss which he dollied to mid-off. All this time, Ant was progressing nicely; indeed he was actually playing on the offside for once in his life, and hitting some tasty cuts and one particualrly nice flick off a beamer than flew away for 4.


Bungle was the next victim, being bowled for 4, then John King departed for 13, after looking pretty good. Dan was next to go, for 6, then Boxer hit a four off Loopy Hooper but then got a tad overexcited and skyed one to mid-off. Jimmy was bowled for 2 and Paul was the last wicket, playing on for 1, to leave Christie as the last man standing. All in all, only Ant (19) can hold his head up with any sort of dignity. Then again, with a face like his, maybe it’s best he keeps his head bowed.


Knowing we needed to get off to a great start in the field if we were to stand any chance, we opened with Andy Turpin and Sandy. Both bowled well, particualrly the latter, and were unfortunate not to get any wickets. Boxer and Jimmy then took over, and continued the tight bowling but again failed to remove either of the openers, who were batting extremely cautiously.


The turning point came when Boxer raced over to Chris to insist that the demon spinner that is Sandsy be brought on to bowl. Chris needed some persuading, but eventually gave in to Boxer’s superior tactical knowledge.

The decision was a beut – with his first ball, Bobby bowled the opener with one that turned, yes, turned, and took off stump. Two balls later, he did exactly the same again, this time with his ‘quickie’. Suddenly, things were on the up. The combovered one was now in full swing, and was so much in the zone that he even forgot about the jip his hip replacement was giving him.


Next over, he took another, again bolwed, and the next, yet another, bowled again. The oppo seemed to be panicking, and simply couldn’t deal with Sandsy’s bowling – maybe they thought they were facing Shane Warne – it’s an easy mistake to make – Paul is blond and rather rotund and the light was beginning to fade a touch.


Baldy Jacobs then came on at the other end and actually managed to pitch the ball consistently. He bowled with swing and pace and caused many problems, and deservedly took a wicket with a peach of a ball that swung more than Abi Titmus on a night out.


In the meantime, Boxer had effected a run out when the batsman unwisely took on his lethal arm and paid the price. Unfotunately, we lost our momentum when their opener, who was still at the crease, faked cramp in order to buy his team a much-needed chance to regain some composure. Chris then brought himself on (makes a change to bringing himself off – DVD reference) and took a wicket with a quick yorker, but couldn’t stem the flow of runs.


Anyway, ultimately, we couldn’t quite stop the runs, and they reached the target with 5 overs remaining. A valiant effort on our part, but we paid the price for a dismal batting display.


Quote of the day: Boxer: ‘Chris, for God’s sake bring on Sandsy – he’s absolutely unplayable’.


Cake of the day: Scones.


Big gay ponce of the day: Ant for his ballerina impression and poofy yelp when he lost the ball in the sun.


Man of the match: Easy this week – the balding one himself – no, stop getting excitied Jimmy, I am of course talking about Mr. Paul Sands. Well done Skip.


So, our season ends on a losing note, which is a shame, but hey, bring on the indoor league and Greenwood Park!


Cheers and well done on a very good season overall. I make it won 16, lost 4. Not bad at all. Thanks for your commitment, both in the weekday and weekend games, during a season that has, for a variety of reasons, been somewhat of a struggle at times.